Two things that I feel I did very well at were first, I was able to put a large amount of imagery to understand what was being shown and I did very well at giving the reader the feeling that they were there and they could truly feel the story not just read it.
Two things I feel could be improved are first, my ability to use more active language rather than uses so much passive. In other words, I need to describe more of what was happening and not say that this happened. Secondly, I need to try and not mix up as much of my vocabulary in order for the story to be more clear.
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