Practice Newspaper Article – Evil Robot Monkey

Chimpanzee with artificial intelligence leaves children scarred

Julia Shaw

A science-based field trip at the local science laboratory on Monday afternoon caused children to be traumatized by Sly, a chimp with a brain implant, after they spooked him outside of his pen, which resulted in Sly demonstrating inappropriate behaviours.

The day had been mostly quiet and dull, when suddenly, “children banged and pounded on my window, and I instinctively threw my clay at the window after being startled,” said Sly, the troublemaking chimpanzee.

However, Sly failed to mention his actions afterward; the chimpanzee, “proceeded to bear his teeth, smudge clay on the window and spell a obscene word for all the children to read, and make a vastly inappropriate gesture towards me,” said Nancy Tales, the teacher caring for the children at the time.

Out of the twenty-two children in attendance of the field trip, eleven have already arranged meetings with Mary Smarts, the local child therapist, who additionally specializes in providing assistance and guidance for scared children.

Delilah Evergreen, owner of the institution, put out a public apology for the incident only a few hours later.

“I didn’t think Sly would mind the children visiting since the other chimps don’t,” said Evergreen when bombarded with questions from the press.

The science laboratory is attempting to gain more control of their chimpanzees with artificial intelligence, especially with the upcoming introduction of Gale, another chimp with a brain implant.