Original story: Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak

 

 

Shipwrecked

 

A pathetic little creature named Max has just failed his test

And when he came home, he does what he does best:

He screams into his pillow and curses at his sister

His mum calls him for supper; he turns away to dismiss her

She has tears in her eyes, her baby’s a monster

But she leaves his meal by the door like a devoted little mother

A pathetic little creature named Max calls one of his friends

(That makes him do his homework on the weekends)

So, he jumps out his window and onto his friend’s boat

They’re sailing down the block

To where the wild things go.

They jump off the boat and walk to the porch,

His friend knocks thrice on the pulsating door

muffled music hiding behind it begins to pump louder

the bouncer lets them in, the large crowd gathers

Scary faces, dark makeup, intimidating demeanor,

Max was in the middle of it all, a puny little creature

“Yo guys, this is Max, our esteemed guest”.

Esteemed? Max thought,

This is going to be swell!

Little did he know it was going to be Hell

The speaker shook the floorboards, it creaked from people jumping

Everyone was holding a red cup, everyone was shouting

Why was it so smoky in here? What smells like cotton candy?

Someone gave him a red cup too, it smelled like Brandy

Oh shit! He thought

“C’mon Max, chug!”

“NO! I can’t…”

“No? you scared Max, you want your mom and dad?”

Max felt weak, inferior, small, one foot tall,

His friends, they were disappointed, they didn’t like him at all.

A domestic house cat could not join a lion’s pride,

But he was no tabby, fire burned in his eyes

He gripped his cup and downed it in one go,

then he grabbed another and another,

Three in a row

He showed them how it was really done; glug, glug, glug

And they cheered and they roared, like a holy chant his weak little name did they sing

He was appointed ruler of them all, king of the wild things.

He chased it with some Gatorade, he really had to go pee,

But a girl made him take a hit off her bong before he could flee.

He sat in the bathroom to take a breather; it was getting harder to see

Faces blurred into red, blue and green

He took this many more shots, that many more blunts

He couldn’t remember exactly how many,

but he was far from done

the wild things howled, yowled and belched

all the weird things you could feel Max felt

someone put some vitamins in his drink

he heard them go in; kerplink, kerplink

but he could not see them, his vision was too far gone

then he looked at his hand

something was wrong

five hideous claws protruded from his arm,

the guy beside him sprouted an extra head

Max shrieked in alarm

The wild things around him began to morph and twist

Their two pairs of eyes grew into six

They were getting scary; he wasn’t feeling too dandy

His red cup hit the floor, staining the carpet with amber-coloured brandy

His stomach ached, he started to feel hot

He missed his dear little mummy and big daddy pop

he just wanted to go home, sail away from this place

but he wouldn’t be able to, just look at his face

it’s pale and flushed, but nobody rushed

to his side because they were too high to care that much

about that pathetic little creature named Max

who lay on the ground, flat

on his back, looking up at the glow in the dark stars

someone finally found him, but it was too late

he had passed into an irretrievable state

His pathetic little body jerked on the floor

He couldn’t sail back home anymore